February 19, 2005 | 12:26 p.m.
<- Rain is falling all around ->

It's a rainy rainy, cool morning/afternoon here in AZ land and I just love it!! I've got the sheets stripped from the beds, the washing machine is spinning, the garbages are emptied and new bags put in and I just felt like a break was in order. I can only do so much at a time before my lame and loserish body screams for a rest. When I'm done here, it's off to switch the wash, put in another load, sweep and mop the kitchen/bath, rest, then dust and vacuum. I love the feeling of a clean house and goodness knows I'm in need.

All of last week well ok, now it's the week before last until Monday the 14th my sister and her two kids were here, staying at my little house. It was soo great to have them here, but holy crap, 2 kids create a lot of mess and chaos and they have a lot of acoutrements! I decided that there would be no baby als living in this house, 'cause I wouldn't have anywhere to put all their baby stuff. Anyway, it was super fun to have D here and to get to spend time with her princess little prissy daughter Liv and her new shweet baby boy O. And since my bro and sis in law live right behind us, it made for constant party. My visiting sis was sad that she couldn't have such fun closeness as we do. She wishes she could live in AZ, but alas her husband refuses to move out of UT. Anyway, Sunday we had my mom, dad, sister and her husband, other sister, plus visiting sister and 2 kids and bro and sis in law AND Tracer ALL in our house. It was tight to say the least, but it was so fun. We had steak and all kinds of food, layed around the living room and talked and watched Extreme Makeover home edition and just had a good time. I love my family, i really do.
-----Side thought...Homemakeover was just here in the valley last week, and Jer got to go to the house/set and meet all the "cast" and help move in the furniture to the finished house, etc. He took all kinds of pics on his phone and video on his phone to document it. He had so much fun, and was just in awe of the whole production of the thing. I can't wait to see that show air, which should be sometime in mid-March.
-----Side thought number 2, speaking homemakeovers, my parentals house is coming along nicely. They finally got all their new hardwood floors in, through the halls and kitchen and laundry room, it's GORGEOUS, and new carpet in their master bedroom, all the walls are painted, new baseboards, new lighting. It's amazing really, and oh so much better than the peach southwestern scariness that was permeating my mothers house. Can't wait for it ALL to get done, probably by this summer.

BIG NEWS ALERT!!!! Jer got a new job, and it could NOT be more exciting. In the summer he applied to be a drama teacher at this local charter school. They loved him, but he doesn't have his degree yet, so they went with a guy who did have his degree. As it turns out this guy was a total disaster and loser and has done NOTHING this whole year with the program. They ended up firing him a week or so ago, and then called Jer and offered him the job. After some negotiating, he took it, and now will be employed full time as a drama teacher on contract with benefits through the rest of this school year and next. He is more than doubling his current income which is the HUGEST relief ever. We have realllllllly been struggling this year to cover our bills and expenses. We're just so freaking buried in blasted credit card debt and student loan debt and everything else. So, this should be a HUGE help to finally make a little headway. I really want to do one of those debt consolodation things where they combine all our debt and we make one monthly payment, but I don't know what to do, or if it's the "right" thing to do?? Anyone know about that, or have suggestions?

So, things have been quite rough between Jer and I for quite some time now, and I've known it, but apparently didn't know HOW rough. Last Sunday we FINALLY talked for the first time in forever and really layed it out on the line. He was finally honest with me about a bunch of stuff, and it felt so good. I mean, it was painful, but it felt good to be doing something positive and communicating. He has A LOT of issues and I didn't realize how truly much they were affecting him, and us, and me. All I've known is I've been so sad, and empty and alone for a long time. So, anyway, he went to the Bish, feels 400 times better, we talked about everything, and we've made some new goals and things are MUCH better right now. Of course this is a long term thing and not like it can be so quickly fixed, but for the first time in a long time I feel like there is hope. Marriage is hard, marriage to someone dealing with seriously complex issues is even harder. But, I know that with God all things are possible and with love and patience and PERSEVERANCE it can work. He doesn't understand why I love him, or why I stay with him, and I can't explain it to him, because I don't understand it fully myself. I just know that I do, and that we're s'posed to be together and that we CAN make it if we try.

Jumping far from that subject...I've become ridiculously addicted to playing canasta online. I spend far to many hours playing that stupid game, and I can't help myself. I need a canasta support group or something. Heaven help me and my time wasting problem. Hell, even this, writing in here is my secret ploy to not be doing all the cleaning I need to. Oh well.

Saw "Beyond the Sea" the Bobby Darrin biopic starring Kevin Spacey...LOVED IT! It was a really good movie and I was truly so impressed with Spacey and his immense talent. He is actually singing in the movie and he's fantastic! I reccommend this movie to one and all.

Tomorrow my sis in law (Jers sis) who is in massage therapy school is coming over to "practice" on me. I'm sooo freaking excited. Free massage, I'm THERE! Goodness knows I NEED it, I haven't been able to move my neck right for weeks and my shoulder is really hurting lately.

In other news, I haven't been able to sleep with my c-pap machine for over a week now because I have a hideous sinus infection thing going on and I can't breathe through my nose. Not breathing through my nose renders the machine useless as it's trying to push air up into my closed off nostrils. UGH!! Needless to say, Jer has been having to deal with my horrid snoring as usual.

Well, time to go switch the laundry.


Change, she is a comin! - November 24, 2006
Little bit of nothin - September 14, 2006
That DID happen! - August 10, 2006
Dinner with famous friends - August 05, 2006
Morningstar - August 04, 2006

What Was | What Will Be

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